Just me, and my shadows truth/Photo Challenge #426

Photo by Marco Bianchetti on Unsplash

All I see is the shadow of a little girl, all though the skin I am in is my adult. I can’t face it day in

All I see is tears pooling down my cheeks, to weak to share. Would they even care

All I see is this little girl scared to death as she crosses the road, memories in toll. Mom screaming “no please don’t do it”. Me curled in a little ball, sobbing uncontrollably for what is about to be my daddy’s end

I am too scared to face my own shadow. I just keeping walking thinking the memories will pass with each swift step. Just me in stringy hair, wanting all the noise to stop. My heart is skipping beats, but my feet are now running. My reflection is only that of my little 3rd grade self. Heeeellllpppp

I am panting, now sprinting from memories pain. The air around me feels like a cage. Stop the insane. Stop him mom, don’t allow him to take his life. He is only thirty, and I nine. My mom his wife. Why oh why? Stop the boiling in my veins from words I’m putting together as horrified moments end

That was it, she screamed louder than anyone I had ever heard “NO”! It was a nightmare, but it was my nightmare true. I ran out, and the phone cord dangled from the table. My mom was not there she ran as fast as my shadow, and left me there all alone staring at the phone bouncing in sorrow. No more tomorrow daddy

I am all alone, I put all the jargon together in my head. My daddy pulled the trigger, and now he is dead. No hope, so lost. At the cost of leaving me alone with my shadow as a little girl, and not wanting to change into its adult as years pass

I can’t chase that shadow anymore, and even give it a moments stare. The pain runs caverns deep. All I would do is weep. Look at it Lisa, what do you see? A five foot two inch girl, in heels. I am not that little girl anymore with stringy hair. I must except the shadow I walk with. It is me, I can’t reside in fear. I am here dealing with the truth, just me and my shadow. It no longer looms. Back to school the next day, and back to reality today I must remain. Sane

https://mindlovemiserysmenagerie.wordpress.com/2022/08/09/photo-challenge-426/

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One-liner Wednesday-every breath is a gift

“Every breath is a gift from the giver of life”. ~S.Graves

I wake up with gratitude to my Lord and Savior for 47 years of the precious breath of life. Countless times God has sparred me when I was spiritually sick in my active alcoholism. As well this last year with my diagnosis of breast cancer.

He gives life, and He takes it away. God isn’t done with me yet, and for that today I celebrate the day He chose me to be part in this world February 17, 1974. May I be used by Him, May I be the difference today with the Holy Spirit which resides in me.

https://lindaghill.com/2021/02/17/one-liner-wednesday-gulp/

The Friday Reminder for #SoCS & #JusJoJan 2021 Daily Prompt – Jan. 30th-the coffee is on

Your prompt for #JusJoJan and Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “the beginning, the end.” Write about the beginning of something and the end of something. Bonus points if your first sentence contains “the end” and your last sentence contains “the beginning.” <– Read that again. Have fun!

The end of my pot of coffee is here oh dear. I sip it all through out my day to wake me, and warm me. The taste lingers in my mouth, and the aroma permeates through my house. There is nothing better to wake to. A new day is here. A new horizon to peer out into.

Morning excitement as my senses are aroused with the smell of fresh brewed beans. I am keen to the smell. Then comes the early morning sound of the peculating of my pot. What is the end of my pot now was hours ago a new beginning.

https://lindaghill.com/2021/01/29/the-friday-reminder-for-socs-jusjojan-2021-daily-prompt-jan-30th/

He said it best, there I shall find rest

I cling to this today, in a world of uncertainty I find myself in prayer. I shall not live in fear, letting go of all at the cross on Calvary.

I find solace in the throne room right at my Father’s feet. I know without a doubt I can trust my unknown future to a very known God. The world may seem crazed, I just have to keep my focus on praising Him in His name! Father “thy will be done”.

This new world order is what must be for you to fulfill things I can not see. I am on bended knee, with faith over fear. You always have our best at heart, you have it down to an art. Even though we can not see the whole picture, you are holding the finished masterpiece in the palm of your hand! On this your truth I stand!

One-Liner Wednesday – Rorschach Test

“It is not how much we have, but how much we enjoy, that makes happiness”. ~Charles Spurgeon

In the light of Thanksgiving, may we all have the spirit of gratitude. I know my life today is far greater than my wildest dreams. I am far from a millionaire, and live quite simply actually, and I couldn’t be happier. It is those simple little gifts that have been given that mean the very most. The matter of the heart gifts. Give thanks with a grateful heart!

https://lindaghill.com/2020/11/25/one-liner-wednesday-rorschach-test/

I am deathly allergic to Turkey, yep for real what a thrill!

Fun fact; I am severally allergic to Turkey. I have been since I was a little girl. My mom chalked it up to the flu every holiday we had.

As I became an adult lying on the bathroom floors of my in-laws praying the Lord would soon take me, I decided to get allergy tested.

I am such joy to have over, and I bring festivity if I am eating at another’s house. So yes I am allergic to Turkey. I have to be very careful going to Potlucks. A lot of people like to substitute Turkey for Hamburger.

As well my list of allergies goes on, and on. All very serious life threatening, anaphylactic reactions. Jolly right! Hall out the Holly, wait I might be allergic.

Well I tell you this it makes it very hard for me to farctate at all. I honestly think of it as a good way to not over indulge. Now I do miss strawberries, and a lot of chocolate has tree nuts (I adore chocolate). So you win some, and you lose some. The older I get the more allergies that I get too.

I will say I am trying hard not to hold a resentment with my mom for not catching on to my Turkey allergy, I mean come on 3 times a year I was deathly ill. 😂😊. Those were the days you just put a bandaid on everything. I am grateful I got it figured out in my adult life. Hey you wanna have me over for great big giant dinner, and watch how I can only eat a dinner roll. It is quite the show 😂👩‍🍳

You learn to roll with the punches, thank God I love ham. It is my favorite. Turkey is overrated anyways. Blessings all, and stay safe this Thanksgiving!

https://wordofthedaychallenge.wordpress.com/2020/11/20/farctate/