“One of the greatest prisons people live in is the fear of what other people think”. ~Toby Mac
You don’t have to be imprisoned any longer, let God set you free. He will remove all the shackles that hold you captive. Whatever fear you have allow him unlock the door, and walk out a free man today! For it is by His grace we get to live in His mercy! Don’t let the world define you, let God define you. For what profit is there for man to gain the whole world, and lose his soul!
I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder. ~G.K. Chesterton
With the utmost sincerity I thank all of my followers today. 400, and going. I have found a true form of self expression inside WP. I have much respect for so many of the people I follow, and their creative attributes either in writing or photography. I as well have gained some genuine friendships.
With all that said I am grateful I have a safe platform to be me. For this I say THANK YOU! God bless you all…
Lots of new colors of lipgloss, but my lips are covered by these masks. Gasping for air every where we go with the mask in tow.
Lots of new clothes for Christmas this year, but there is no where to go. No one to care.
Lots of restrictions then phases, and then changes in phases along with restrictions again and again. Back to phase 1 same song, new dance. Just want get these masks off our faces. Open back up all of our favorite places.
I want see people smile, play dress up, and eat in fancy restaurants. So many places are closing their doors. Changing the map of the what once was our cities. What a pity.
Lots of new colors of lipgloss, but my lips are covered by these masks. Gasping for air everywhere we go with the mask in tow.
Lots of new clothes for Christmas this year, but there is no where to go. No one to care.
Back to phase one, no one can hug. Elbow bumps are lame. Same old game, just another dance. What are the chances we will ever get to take off these masks. I promise at home in my house my lipgloss is pretty.
This is the nitty gritty of our new norm. We have to weather this storm. I know people are losing their minds. These are the signs of the times…
The lipgloss will be expired, and not a match for my skin by the time it might be seen. Just as maddening the next store is having to hang their closed sign in shut of its doors. Years of service to the city. What a pity.
I want to hug people, the elbow bump seems so impressionable. My eyes don’t light up enough for anyone to see I am smiling (I promise I am). This world all looks as if it is lying, even dying.
I promise at home in my house my lipgloss is pretty. Not a first world problem, but still what a pity. This is the end of my sharing my thoughts I have a runway show to put on with all my new swag. Back to phase 1 it makes me so sad. No one will see the frown I wear under my Keen mask. Corona is having a blast.
I promise at home in my house my lipgloss is pretty, what a pity.
These are signs of the times, now you all know what is on my mind. Hey I will be here all weekend. 😂🤣😂 cuz we back to phase 1. Son of a gun…The government has us under their thumb.
Happy New Year to all on WP! Another bites the dust! So much to be grateful for in 2020! I am breast cancer free, and soon enough will be looking at this whole journey in the rear view mirror. God is so gracious!
Blessings All, Lisa
Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 1 Thessalonians 5:13
“But whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my Father which is in heaven.” Matthew 10:33
DC talk said it best, “What will people think when they hear that I’m a Jesus freak? (It’s the…) What will people do (…freakshow) when they find that it’s true”? Ho ho Ho ho ho-o Ho ho
This morning I am readying myself to see my surgeon, and yes I am very emotionally/physically drained. I cried upon waking which is not my norm. I was quickly reminded of the gift of the breath of life I have. I was reminded how much worse it could be. I was reminded how His mercies are new EVERYmorning. I was reminded that “this too shall pass”. I may have to do this often throughout my day, recognize how great a God I serve. I may be on repeat of hoe He is holding the pen, if I allow Him. How He is in charge, and when I try to take over things just go awry. My heart has the desire for His compass. I know His compass always has my best at heart! It’s art really! Beautiful majestic art! Letting go, and letting Jesus my author my savior hold the pen!
Last night I was advised to go the Emergency room after talking to the on call surgeon. I am one week post swapping out my tissue expanders for implants. The last surgery in my breast cancer journey. Yesterday was the worst I felt the whole time since my surgery.
I was in tears when I was told my husband could not be with me at all. They were doing a work up for sepsis. I had tears streaming my face as my phone would not even connect to make a call out.
Thankfully after a long day with a fever, and feeling very nauseous my blood work came back all clear. My blood pressure was high when I got there. I refused all medication while there, because of all my allergies. I was the only person who could advocate for my own health. They were going to give something on my list of allergies.
So at the end of it all the conclusion is I have a pretty good sized Seroma. I will be seeing my surgeon tomorrow to see how we are going to address this. I am in a lot of pain. I am so swollen, but thank God I am home. Thank God it was not sepsis. Makes you realize how precious life is, and how fast things can change.
I was so weak, and sleepy. The Seroma was just making me feel crappier than I even knew. I have had many of you responding with prayers, and kind words. I just wanted to update you all on what is happening as of now.
So I am resting, and my husband was given 2 more days off of work to be with me. I so appreciate all of your prayers! Lord willing I will stop draining soon. I just keep holding on to “this too shall pass”.
God bless you all, may God be with you all as we approach the coming New Year!
So yesterday I had my final breast cancer surgery. My husband, and I were overwhelmed by the prayer response we got. I woke to texts, FB private messages all saying we are praying. As well they reassured us how much God had me. Which there was no doubt how very present he was.
I have such a very complicated health background. So when my double mastectomy went off without a hitch I was ecstatic to say the least. I was writing home to mama even though really she lives here, and I am able to call her on the phone. It just sounded sounded better to say that lol (more dramatic). Writing home to mama…😄
We knew the risks, complications, and just about all that goes into breast implants after a double mastectomy. Trust me we double, triple, and quadruple checked our information as well statistics. I am allergic to so many medications, and foods. This is decision was not taken lightly, or without fervent prayer.
My surgeon in all honesty after reading my prior health history told me his anxiety went up even thinking about the double mastectomy let alone putting implants of a foreign nature in my body. He in the end with us, after weighing heavily all options gave his approval. I went all summer with just above my average size breasts before my masectomy for the tissue expanders, which are what stretches my skin for the implants that are now my breasts.
So as I sit here everything at this moment looking back in retrospect everything went better than expected, and God answers prayers! Prayer is so powerful! I did have to have drain tubes that are producing very little blood. They will be taken out the morning of Christmas Eve if they keep producing less than 15 milliliters. Which I am pretty certain they will be.
So far what I see in the mirror I am excited about, I could have never have gone without breasts. The lack of sensation in my breast tissue has been quite enough for me to accept alone.
So now our prayer is for no post surgery infection, and number one on my list is SLEEP. I have the opposite reaction to anesthesia. Which is more common than realized. I have slept 2 1/2 hours since being home at 4 p.m. yesterday. I suffer from insomnia for about the first 3 days the anesthesia messes with my internal sleep clock. Which I am trying to keep my attitude in check since my “hot” wonderful husband was by the grace of God able to take a week off of work in care of me. So I smile when he walks by even though all I wish to do is scream “I need sleep”! I won’t do that though. I am going to try for small catnaps today. Which hasn’t happened yet.
I know the size of my breasts are to me perfect because it is the same cup size I was before they removed them. They are just more full as I am almost 47, and have had two children 24, and 22 years ago. So they just look happier. They may not be super natural, but I have breasts. I am free of breast cancer! I rode my mountain bike all summer with as much ease as you can with expanders that are the same as the implants I have now, but felt like a vice contraption. These implants are so much more natural feeling. The stretching of my skin that is so thin from the removal of my breasts, was very painful. It has all been worth it. This is not the route for every woman as each case is so individual to the woman. It is such a personal, and intimate path. So soon with God on our side this journey will all be in the rear view mirror. God has so done miracles in this body of mine. The surgeon said to my husband “if all my patients had as healthy of tissue as your wife it sure would make my job easier”.
All God none of me, I think not drinking has played a huge roll in that. Sobriety has served so many positive roles in my life. As well All God not me. I am just a willing participant in this journey of my life. Praise God for that. I show up for my life today!
We have meals for over a week, from a meal train my mom started. How very blessed we feel. The hardest part about this is not being able to hug our closet. When my mom came over the night before my surgery, with her soon to be fiancé to bring food. Saying goodbye without a hug was the hardest part. I teared up, and my heart felt sad. It has been too long of this social distancing from those who hold the closest places in our hearts!
So as I am finishing up this post, I am a very sleep deprived, extremely blessed woman. Who knows my creator God was present through this whole journey from diagnosis to now. If there are errors or anything confusing in this post please excuse me, as it is time to try one of those catnaps I am in desperate need of. As well my husband has not once left my side (he is a God send). He too is very emotionally drained. He is already snoring away next to me, hopefully that will be me soon enough. Except I don’t snore. Blessings All. Sorry for the long post..lots in my heart ❤️
For this reason I bow my knees before the Father…that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being. (Ephesians 3:14,16)
He leads me to “still waters”, he leads me, and I follow. For there all the noise, and chaos in my day is made tranquil. I can then have a heart open to emerse myself in you. For my prayer is that I can be still, and always know that you are God. In the hustle, and bustle of my days it is easy to get raptured by schedules. Schedules where you have not been penciled in.
How easy for you Lord God to be pushed aside in the rush. It takes but a moment to give you my day, and to make your will my want. Hushed! To remember that you gave me the breath of life that I may have yet another day to be drawn to to you. Lord let there be “still waters” in each day so I can take this time to be in awe in Praise of you. For you are my hope, and my strength. Lead me, and I will follow. Hushed in my heart, and quieted in spirit.
Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “list.” Make or talk about a list. Enjoy!
I have one thing on my list of things to do today. It is simply to step back giving this “one day” over to God and saying “thy will be done, not mine”. When I do this, I get out of the way. It is miraculous how God shows up. He just simply allows the day to go exactly according to His will. I reap the benefits of peace no matter if it something simply marvelous that comes to me, or possibly very painful. He is present in all circumstances, and I am never alone!
My list is to be who God calls me to be today! Maybe today you sit with a grieved, heavy heart. Maybe you are filled with fear, and uncertainty. This world is a little upside down, and backwards. It is not without a purpose though. There is hope in the midst of every storm.
We can dance in the rain, smile in the pain, and raise our hands in praise for He has all authority. He is sovereign. I will today trust God knows better than I do what is best for me. In Jesus name my list is given to my Father, best friend, and He walks on water. He does circles in miracles around my life.
Don’t give up before the miracle happens. I almost did, then I saw a glimmer of light. Now today 7 plus years later I get to delight in giving Jesus Christ my life.
Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.